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Does anyone out there visit chat rooms? I tried to go into one the other day but I was so overwhelmed by everyone talking at once that I gave up. Is there a secret for dealing with these things or am I just too old to learn? Someone out there send me some suggestions .

I just read something that said that the person dies but the relationship doesn't- how true is that. I guess that is why the loss of a loved one is so painful- you can't let the emotional ties that you have go. But the person that you love is gone so there is no where for those feelings to go.

I have been turned on to a website called GROWW.org by one of my friends. It seems to be really helpful and compassionate so I want to put it out there for anyone who is suffering a loss and needs somewhere to turn.

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I have been thinking an awful lot about signs from our dear departed ones lately. I have spoken to other people about their experiences and they have had many signs also. I am not sure why I find this so comforting but I really do.

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Today would have been my son"s thirtyfirst birthday but he died fourteen years ago. People ask how do you live with this- I don"t- I live despite this. I asked my son and my husband to send me a sign today because I needed it. When I was outside cleaning out my kitty litter box with the hose a beautiful butterfly flew along beside me. It followed me while I was doing this chore and I thought how delightful it was that it seemed so unafraid of me. Then I thought - is this my sign ? I think I will believe that it is and thank them both for the peaceful feeling it has given to me.

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Yesterday I was speaking with my best friend about the afterlife and if it was possible to receive messages from our loved ones . Well today I think I may have gotten a message. While I was brushing my teeth this morning I was looking in the mirror and I wasn't liking what I was seeing. I realized that I looked my age and then some. I was bloated in the face from too much sleep, bloated everywhere else from too many carbohydrates, and just generally looking sort of rough. But I decided not to dwell on it because I had too much to do so I jumped in the shower, got myself together, and headed out to the grocery store. While I was standing in the laundry detergent aisle having a silent debate with myself over the value of the premium brand versus the no frills brand an older asian woman touched me on the forearm. She said you very pretty- I smiled at her embarrased and said thank you. She said no thank you - the world needs pretty things. Was that a message from the other side when I needed it most or what?

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I have been thinking about how hard it is to be a single when you have been part of a couple. If you had always been single that would be your identity but when you are suddenly single that is where the struggle begins. It is like you had your identity stolen but there is no magic website that you can go to and have it recovered for you. Yesterday I was talking about perception and this is an example of that. You see yourself now as only half of what you once were and other people see you that way too so now are you of less value or does it only feel that way?